One of the great things about all the new widgets available on blogs, is the ability to view who is coming to one’s blog and what they are searching for. Just a few days ago, I noticed that someone was looking for “Kallah on her Wedding Day”. Since this is something of interest to many women, here are some valuable tips for your special day.
First of all, if you are reading on this topic, I presume either you or a close relative or friend are soon to come to Chuppah, Mazal Tov. It is an incredible experience and a very special day. From my own personal experience of getting married and being an occupational therapist, one of the first tips I can say is have everything well planned all the time leading up to this Special Day and then allow for some flexibility. What do I mean by that?
There are certain things that can only take place on this day and no other and these must be planned and the timing worked out in advance to make sure everything occurs in the right order and you get to the Chuppah on time. Regarding flexibility, there are times when certain details get muddled, if so, allow some flexibility. We will come back to this idea in a bit.
The day of the Chuppah for the Kallah, really begins the day before as she prepares for going to the mikvah. Make sure you have plenty of time available for all the preparation and that there are women around to offer support. The whole week leading up to the Chuppah, other forces are at play to try to prevent this very important mitzvah, this is why it is imperative that both the Kallah and Chosen have a Shomer, someone to be with them and “guard” them throughout the week leading up to the Chuppah.
The night of the Mikvah is an extra special time to make sure the Kallah is not left alone. I will not go into the details of immersing, for that, I hope you have a really good, kind and caring Kallah Teacher. What I will add though is that some women get so nervous as the big day arrives that they struggle to sleep. If this is the case, you might want to book a massage the day before the wedding, prior to or after the Mikvah or even a few leading up to the Chuppah. Please see the article on this blog LEIV ESTHER
Having taken care of all that you need to the night before, make sure you get to bed in time to have a good rest and feel refreshed for your special day. Please do all that you can to make sure that there are no last minute writing out of place tags, finalizing details etc that might keep you up all night. All the other stuff we want complete before you go to mikvah.
Let us suppose that you have now awoken for your final preparation leading up to the Chuppah. This day is a very special one on very many levels. This is a day that for the
There is a custom for the Kallah to go through the Sefer Tehillim on the day of her wedding. If you read the Tehillim at a good pace, then this is a wonderful thing to do. If you are very slow at reading Tehillim, get your female friends, relatives, rebbetzins etc to join in. The more who recite Tehillim for and with you the better. Once again, make sure the Tehillim are distributed earlier in the week, don’t leave it to the last minute. If you are able to, assign someone to organize this for you. Also, if you have assigned yourself let us say 50 Tehillim to say, make sure you have some women on standby to complete them for you if you run out of time.
When you are planning your schedule of having your hair beautifully done for you, nails painted, make up done etc, make sure to get the order co-ordinated. The ideal is if you can have the woman or women who do your hair and make up to come to you, this way you reduce running around and have more time for your Tehillim and to be calm and ready for the special time of joining with your Chosen under the Chuppah.
If someone is storing your dress and veil for you, make sure that everything has been checked at least 2 days prior to the wedding. The last thing you want is to find out on your wedding day that the veil can not be used or something else has happened.
Now for the words on flexibility, in my situation, as I was getting my things together to prepare for the mikvah, I decided to check my veil. To my horror there was a huge tear from top to bottom right in the centre. The nature of the material was such that it could not easily be repaired, certainly not quickly. I was getting married in a city that was not my home town and had no idea what to do. So I called a friend who was like an angel. She put me at ease and said she would go to a gemach and see if she could find anything. Of course, by this time the gemach was closed and the next day at 2 pm, I needed to be ready and at the Shul. Lo and behold, while I was sitting having my hair done the next morning, this friend arrived with two options of veils. Needless to say, the first she offered was much prettier than the original.
So if something like this happens, take a deep breath, daven to Hashem and call in any women you know who might help. You will be amazed at how incredibly things can work out to be even better than you had hoped for.
When it came to our flowers, the women doing my flowers had agreed on certain colours and types of flowers to be given to the mothers to pin on their lapel. I had chosen soft pink flowers and was rather taken aback to find that what arrived at the house moments before we were to leave for the Shul were yellow daffodils. My dear mother noticed these and smiled, reminding me that the yellow daffodil was a special flower to my beloved grandmother who had returned her soul to Hashem just a short while before. There is a teaching that on ones wedding day, all relatives who have passed on, come and celebrate with you. My grandmother certainly sent a wonderful message to let us know she was there too.
There is much more that could be written on the Wedding Day for the Kallah. If you would like assistance with preparing for your wedding so as to be organized and reduce or eliminate stress, please do contact Shoshanah. You are also welcome to set up an appointment for a massage and or healing for the Kallah or any other women attending a wedding in
If you are outside of
Looking forward to hearing form you.
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