Sunday, 19 July 2009

Searching for Your Zivug (Soulmate)


Navigating the winding and often complex path of Shidduchim is hard for many singles. To ease this process, many of the thoughts of advise and Eitza written by the Lubavitcher Rebbe have been compiled into a book on Shidduchim and Marriage.

When one plays the role of Shadchan, it is necessary to refresh one's memory of important points and concepts on this topic. One idea that was expressed in a number of excerpts that I read over Shabbos was as follows:

The Rebbe reminds men that they are to search for their zivug like one would search for a lost object and perhaps even more so. "(ie to invest even more energy in seeking a shidduch than one seeking a lost object).

Needless to say, this quest should be carried out in accordance with 'the path of the Torah' and with 'fear of Heaven' and with energetic input on the part of friends and relatives.

With regard to that which you write that you would like to know from the outset who is your intendend life partner - according to the guidelines and directives of the holy Torah, the Torah of life, it is important to follow the order of nature, (ie one's future is not foretold and is not for us to know)" Igros Kodesh Vol XIV p 23

The above guidance of the Rebbe offers some insight into the difficulty many potential new members of our Shidduch database pose. Often they ask why should we fill out so many answers and we want a guarantee that you already have our zivug on your database.

As the Rebbe outlines, we are not in the business of foretelling the future. We would love if your zivug is already on our database but it does happen that perhaps you join first and later your zivug. The important thing is to follow the ways of nature. Fill out the form, put in your effort to daven, keep in contact and work with us to help ease your path to Chuppah.

May it be G-d's will that the shidduch be in a good and auspicious hour.

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