Monday, 29 December 2014

A Powerful Message by Rabbi Eli Mansour on Lashon Hara

Chutzpa and brazenness are on the increase in our generation. Is this sufficient to extend the Gulut? 

Listen to a powerful message from Rabbi Eli Mansour at the Chofetz Chaim Foundation as to what causes us in Exile and what keeps us here.

Thursday, 25 December 2014

We are Sponsoring Your First Mikvah Immersion

Chessed Ve'Emet is offering a unique package to increase in the Mitzvah of Taharas HaMishpachah (the Laws of Family Purity)

A number of years ago, we began a special project "Purity with Dignity"  assisting needy Jewish women with their Mikvah expenses. For various reasons, this project evolved into our Bayit Chadash Gemach (assisting orphans at the time they marry)

We have just had a request to start another Taharas HaMishpachah project.

If you are a Kallah or already married Jewish couple and have not been to the Mikvah due to financial reasons, we invite you to participate.

We are offering:

1) An introductory Shiur for the Chatanim and an introductory Shiur for the Kallot of 45 minutes each. The Shiur will take place online, in a group of up to 9 Chatanim and 9 Kallot. Please note the Chatanim and Kallot are taught separately.

2) Financial assistance for Mikvah immersion.

Are you interested? Conditions do apply. Amongst the conditions, the offer of financial assistance is only available to those in Israel. The Shiur however, is available for others too. Please be in touch if you are interested in taking part and for how to apply and sign up.

This offer expires on 31 Dec 2014. Act quickly.

We look forward to hearing from you

Shoshanah Shear

Tuesday, 23 December 2014

Shidduch for a Divorcee

 This is part of our creative ways to increase the chances for those on our Shidduch database.

If you have visited this blog before, you will be aware of our Shidduch service. If you are new to this blog, welcome.

Chessed Ve'Emet has an active Shidduch service. We work professionally and offer a thorough and comprehensive service.

Part of our service is to be on the look out for suitable matches for those who have already joined us. As a result, I have begun posting some brief sketches of singles. Our request for today is any men out there who are Torah observant, live in Israel and are interested in marrying a lovely Jewish woman in her early 30's who is divorced with children. This Shidduch could be suitable for someone previously married too. 

If you are interested in Shidduchim please be in touch with Chessed Ve'Emet. Please visit our website and get to know how we work. You can contact us for to schedule an appointment for an interview via our website or by sending an email. 

Monday, 22 December 2014

Learn How to Draw a Chanukiah

Do you love to draw? Have you always wanted to learn how to draw?

If you would love to know how to draw a Menorah for Chanukah, here is a fun video that provides a very good guide as to how to plan and draw and attractive Menorah / Chanukiah.

Enjoy, the video and happy drawing.

Sunday, 21 December 2014

A Chanukah Thought

It's the 6th candle or night of Chanukah. Don't you love this time of year? The candles light up the windows and entrances to Jewish homes. It's a pretty time and a happy time. What do you enjoy most about this time of year?

Yesterday I took note of the paragraph added in Shmoneh Esraei or the Amidah Prayer. Have you noticed how many times we are reminded that Hashem fought our battles? He gave the many into the hands of the few? He overturned the disaster and turned it to joy? He helped us to succeed and to continue to be Nation that brings light into this world. That's quite a thought. On the one hand it's quite a responsibility on the other, it's a reassurance.

So what is holding us back from Moshiach coming? How many times do we need to go through these hard, hard challenges for the Final Redemption to become a reality?

I discussed it a little with my husband. I pondered whether Am Yisrael (the Nation of Israel) needs to internalize just how much Hashem (G-d) does for us, or whether the other nations need to realize no matter how many times they try to get rid of us, we are still here. My husband reminded me of another point. There are times that tragedy struck because we angered Hashem. We need to be careful not to become arrogant with our role in this world, but rather to internalize that being Jewish comes with a responsibility to live life according to G-d's rules. That's a tall order but it's what we are here to do.

So it seems it's a combination. Do you agree?

Since fulfillment of the Mitzvos is what helps to bring light into the darkness and shows the world how to live by G-d's Will, what Mitzvah are YOU going to add THIS Chanukah to help to tip the scales in favour or the final redemption.

If you'd like to introduce a learning schedule into your life, so that you can learn more about Chanukah or the laws Hashem has given us or any other aspect of Torah, do visit our website. We offer Torah learning of the Sefer (book) of your choice, online or in person, individually or in groups. We'd love to hear what your need is in Torah learning.

Thursday, 18 December 2014

Chanukah Gift

I love to be creative. Do you?

One of the best parts of being involved in developing the kind of Torah - Healing Centre we are starting is that I can use each of my creative skills at various different times. My latest project has been putting together a Chanukah Gift from a friend in U.S. who wishes to give a gift for her mother-in-law in Israel.

This has been so much fun to assemble. We printed some photographs of our friend's children and presented them attractively in two of the photo-frames available in our store. One of them can be seen in the image above. The items in the above image were mostly used in the gift package. The two plates were two options given to our friend from which she was able to chose which set of dishes she wanted to give.

In the image above shows the gifts individually packaged. 

The inside of the box we prepared to enable us to deliver it from Beitar to Modiin. 

The box wrapped with a few fun stickers is already and waiting for our delivery person.

If you would like to purchase a gift for a friend or loved one, please visit our website and be in touch. We have many more items in stock than can be seen on the website, so do let us know your needs and if we have it or can obtain it we will certainly be happy to put an attractive gift together or to quote you for obtaining items needed. 

If you have a car and are prepared to volunteer some hours. We urgently need drivers to help both in collecting items and in delivering gifts. As Purim is now the next Chag on the agenda, we are in need of drivers to assist in delivering Mishloach Manos on Purim. Please be in touch ASAP if you can deliver between Beitar Illit and Efrat, RBS, Beit Shemesh, Yerushalayim, Modiin or can do other areas. We need to know we can have drivers before we can begin marketing for our Mishloach Manos. A percentage of the sale of our Mishloach Manos goes towards costs for Chessed Ve'Emet and our Bayit Chadash Gemach

Sunday, 14 December 2014

Our Library Begins

We've been working slowly and methodically to begin our lending library. We have one full bookshelf  (as can be seen in the image above) filled with interesting Seforim and are about to obtain a second bookshelf. We have many more books ready to be placed onto the shelves. We do still require software to catalogue the books correctly and a bar code reader. We are not really ready to lend the books out until we have everything categorised and all in order. 

In the meantime, yesterday (on Shabbat) while quietly doing some Tehillim and learning, we suddenly had a knock on the door. My husband got up to see who was at the door.

"Hello," he said, as he opened the door. "How may I help you?" 

"I'm visiting family N a few floors down from you and they said you are English Speakers. I wondered if you have an English book that I can borrow for the rest of Shabbos."

"Yes," Rabbi Shear replied. "It just so happens that we are starting a lending library with English Torah books. What kind of book would you be interested in?"

We listened to the type of book she wanted, went inside to select a few and came out with a bundle of about 8 options. She happily selected one and off she went to enjoy the rest of her Shabbos.

What a wonderful way to start our lending library. But now we have some areas we need assistance with. It seems there can be situations when our Israeli neighbours have an English speaking visitor who would like a book for Shabbos or just a few hours. What are your thoughts to arrange this effectively? After all, if we suddenly get many neighbours' guests coming on Shabbos to borrow a book, we cant write down the information of who borrowed which book and which neighbour they are staying with. We'd need a good plan and rules in place. If you have any thoughts to help with rules as we begin, we'd love to hear.

We also realise that our library would need to remain in-house or be close to us for these kinds of last minute Yidden. It's not so easy, as we did not have the light on in the room we have our library books in, this together with some books still being in boxes, made us select books for her. We look forward to being fully set-up.

Stay tuned for updates of our developing Lending Library Le'Ilui Nishmas:
  • Nathan ben Moshe a"h (my late grandfather who was Niftar at just 35 years)
  • Nathan Gershon ben Nathan a"h (my late father who was Niftar at just 46 years)
  • Dov Daniel ben Zelig Pinchas a"h (my late brother-in-law who was Niftar at just 44 years)

Friday, 12 December 2014

Mishnah in the Merit of a Dearly Departed Relative

Rabbi Eliyahu Shear has just completed learning Mishnayos in the merit of an Aliyah Neshama for the Yartzheit of a beloved grandmother of someone who turned to Chessed Ve'Emet for our Mishnayos programme. He completed an hour learning Mishnah together with commentary. You can arrange this for your loved one too. 

If you have a Yartzheit coming up for a parent, sibling, grandparent or someone else who is important to you and would like to be a part of bringing merit to their Neshama, please do be in touch with Chessed Ve'Emet. We have a special programme on the go, learning Mishnayos in the merit of your loved one. 

We invite you to visit our website where you will find all the information of how this works. 

Or visit our slide show presentation to learn more about why Mishnah is important to bring an elevation to the Neshama (Soul) of a dearly departed.

Thursday, 4 December 2014

Pregnancy and Niddah

One of our readers wants to know about pregnancy and Niddah. During the first three months for the purposes of Niddah, the pregnancy is not yet confirmed. "From the beginning of the fourth month... if the woman had a Hargashah (sensation), checked and found nothing she is pure and we presume that bleeding has stopped" (Pages 14-15 Family Purity - A Guide to Marital Fulfillment by Rabbi Fishel Jacobs)

If a woman is pregnant or thinks that she might be and has questions as to whether a check (Bedikah) is necessary or not, the best thing to do is to ask a competent orthodox rabbi, expert in the laws of Niddah. Don't rely on what you find on the Internet. Every woman is unique and the best habit to get into regarding Niddah questions is to ask a competent rabbi expert in these laws to determine what you need to do according to your situation. 

If you are new to the laws of Family Purity and do not yet have a rabbi to consult, be in touch with Rabbi Eliyahu Shear from Chessed Ve'Emet. Rabbi Shear is both a Chatan teacher and has a Semichah in Niddah.

Tuesday, 2 December 2014

To People Who Want To Learn Torah But Can't Get Started

Many people become interested in what Torah and Judaism have to offer but do not know where to get started. They may lack basic Hebrew or have some Hebrew but not enough to translate. They may not know where to begin. Which books and commentaries are acceptable and which are problematic. What is authentic Judaism and what is an adaptation.

Perhaps you are searching for meaning, having questions come up for you and not sure where to begin to look or who to ask.

The images here show just a few of the types of books / Seforim available. Or ones dilemma looking at a pile of books you know might be good for you and no idea where to begin or how to reach that certificate of achievement that lies at the top. 

If any of these are true for you, do be in touch with Chessed Ve'Emet. We offer Torah learning on line and in person at your own pace. If you need to learn to read Hebrew we are happy to teach you. If you are already reading Hebrew but not yet able to learn, we'd love to help you too. And if you have done some learning and wish to delve into a different Sefer to text, we'd love to help you to reach your Torah learning goals too.

Please visit our website and be in touch to schedule an appointment to discuss what your level or Torah learning is and what your goals are. If you do not yet have goals, not to worry, we can assist you to develop appropriate goals for your stage of life and level of learning.

We look forward to chatting with you and learning together.

Monday, 1 December 2014

Searching for Solutions to the Shidduch Problems.

There's been quite a bit of discussion happening over the topic of men over 50 years old wanting to marry a woman much younger who will give him children. For the most part, women are not happy with this. 

Someone on my FaceBook commented I'll say it bluntly: women are not baby machines! And kids are not prized possessions to display. I'm really wary of men who want a wife who will produce babies for him. It is a mind set that sets off red flags for me. Any guy over 50 who wants to get married solely for the baby machine affect is not a guy who is really ready to commit to the real work it takes, to build a true Bayis Ne'eman.

As the comments from women continue to stream in, we have not had any solutions offered. 

What do you look for in a spouse or a Shidduch? Do you think of similar interests? Do you think of similar lifestyles or life goals? Do you look at the persons attributes? There is a lot more to a successful Shidduch than whether the woman is of an age to provide children.

Also, what will you do if you work so hard, finally find the right Shidduch. On paper it all seems perfect and then, OH DEAR? Nothing happens. What will you do if the Shidduch is based ONLY on children and after many many many failed treatments, Hashem says NO!

You see, Hashem can do that when we least expect it. Of course most people want children and it is good to want to continue the Jewish Nation. However, there needs to be more to your Shidduch than only the age to bring children. You need to know your relationship will still hold up in the event Hashem alters the plan and your goal for the marriage does not work out. 

If you are looking for a Shidduch and interested in exploring what kind of relationship will be most suited to you. Do be in touch with Chessed Ve'Emet.

If you already know what your life goals, interests, values and beliefs are and wish to begin dating or are needing to meet more potential Shidduchim, do be in touch for a Shidduch Interview. Please visit our website where all the information of how we work is listed and be in touch to book your interview TODAY. Why wait another moment?

Sunday, 30 November 2014

Shidduch Problems - Men over 50 - Part 3

We're discussing the theme that has come up of a number of men over 50 years old who are either previously married with children or never been married and want a Shidduch with a woman who can give them children. Some of them make demands at the outset as to what extent the woman has to be prepared to go with fertility treatment in order to provide the children they want. 

We have listed some comments from women in previous posts. Here are a few more comments from women on this topic.

"It is a whole problem with today's society where it is OK to postpone having children until later because one can make babies this days in a syringe, not the old way. Without thinking that sometimes later can be too late." (Anonymous)

Following along this line of thought, Yael Maizels, who has a PhD in developmental and cancer biology and teaches anatomy, shares "I think the media has unwittingly done a huge injustice to women - I.V.F is a phrase bandied around with such ease and people have no idea what the procedure requires. I think these men can't make this a precondition. Its absurd."

Another woman agreed. "Men should be aware that women have a body, and it belongs to them. The decision should be theirs. The effects of treatments etc. will be felt by them (the women). Some may want to go through it, some may not want to. Building a family together can be done through adoption as well. There are so many children out there that need homes. I would say men should focus on finding a woman, than work out building a family with them. Like dating couples at all ages do." (Anonymous)

One woman shared that she has a friend who pursued his career, obtained a PhD, got married later then the biological clock began to cause problems. They have already had several failed I.V.F treatments and the biological clock is clicking away.

"I would encourage the men to become more educated with the subject. Perhaps you can direct them to some literature and what it actually entails? If both members of a couple are interested in doing this, fine or looking into other ways to have children, but honestly, these men are 50 and they have to accept that perhaps that ship has sailed... She asked too, if some of these men are wanting "Miss young and pretty who can provide babies", what are they offering? Perhaps it's time for a reality check." (Anonymous)

Please visit our blog again for the next post of comments on what women think of this request. 

Do you have an opinion on the topic. Please post your comment below.

Are you searching for a Shidduch? Visit our website, Chessed Ve'Emet and be in touch for your Shidduch Interview.

Having some difficulty with the Shidduch Process? Be in touch with Chessed Ve'Emet for a Shidduch workshop, mentoring or counseling to assist in easing your process and helping you come to Chuppah.


Thursday, 27 November 2014

Looking for a Suitable Match

Chessed Ve'Emet has a professional, comprehensive and caring Shidduch service. We work with Jews looking to get married both for first time and second marriages. We work with all Hashkafot that are authentic Torah. Age wise we work with early 20's right through to 70's.

We recently had a phone call from one of the lovely ladies in her 50's to find out if we had someone suitable for her. We'd really love to help her get married hence asked her permission to post a brief outline.

If you know any men from 52 years – 60 years old who are intelligent, learned in Torah but cool, living in Israel or prepared to live here. The man must be financially secure. Hashkafa should preferably be Chabakook. He must be interested in marrying a widow in her 50's who has children from a previous marriage.

She is a friendly, fun, caring person, easy to talk to with many interests.

If you know any Jewish men who suit this description, please have them be in touch with Chessed Ve'Emet to come for an interview to find out if you are a suitable match. 

We do have other women in this age range, too.

We look forward to hearing form you

Tuesday, 25 November 2014

The Benefit of Learning Torah

I was learning a little from Pirkei Avot (Ethics of our Fathers) and reminded of some beautiful and powerful thoughts. Pirkei Avot is a section from Mishnah that contains a selection of moral teachings from our sages of 2000 years ago.

In Pirkei Avot 6: 9 we learn of a powerful exchange that took place between a rabbi and a certain man. 
"Rabbi Yose ben Krisma said: 'Once, I was walking along the road when a man came up to me. He greeted me and I returned the greeting. He said to me, 'Rabbi, from what place are you?' 

I said to him, 'I am from a great city of scholars and sages.' 

He said to me, 'Rabbi, would you be willing to live with us, in our place? I would give you thousands upon thousands of golden dinars, precious stones and pearls.'

I replied, 'Even if you were to give me all the silver and gold, precious stones and pearls in the world, I would dwell nowhere but in a place of Torah.' And so it is written in the book of Psalms by David, King of Israel: 'I prefer Torah of Your mouth above thousands in gold and silver' (Psalms 119:72). Further, when a man departs from this world, neither silver, nor gold, nor precious stones, nor pearls escort him, but only Torah study and good deeds, as it is said: 'When you walk it shall guide you, when you lie down, it shall guard you; and when you awake, it shall speak on your behalf' (Proverbs 6:22) 'When you walk, it shall guide you' - refers to this world; 'when you lie down, it shall guard you' - refers to when you are in the grave; 'and when you awake' it shall speak on your behalf' - in the World to Come. And it says:' mine is the silver, and Mine is the gold, says Hashem (G-d), Master of Legions (Chaggai 2:8)" (translation mostly with assistance of Artscroll's edition of Pirkei Avot)

The most precious possession we can acquire in this world is Torah learning and acts of goodness and kindness.  Don't wait until it is too late to try to learn what you should have been learning all your life. Begin your learning today. Contact us at Chessed Ve'Emet. We have learning opportunities for various different levels of Torah learning. 

If you are really busy and not yet sure how to make the time to learn, not to worry, you can participate by supporting Torah. Help us to develop our Torah outreach further and make a contribution and share the link. Everyone stands to gain.

Monday, 24 November 2014

Learning Torah Online

What are your thoughts of learning Torah?

More and more, people verbalize the problems of today. The modern lifestyle and how life has in so many ways lost meaning. What is the purpose? What is the point?

There are answers, and the answers to ALL your questions lie in the Torah. Some enjoy going to a group Shiur (lesson) but for some who live in areas far from a Synagogue or, who for various reasons need to learn online from the comfort of their own home, another option is necessary.

Chessed Ve'Emet uses the latest options to reach out to all. Torah teaching is possible via Skype with webcam, gmail with webcam, google hangout or even various virtual classrooms. We'd like to get the word out to many more Jews and non-Jews who need to learn the wealth of wisdom that Torah has to offer.

Please join us in our current campaign. If you would like to sign up for online Torah learning, you are welcome to do so by emailing us or visiting our website and being in touch via the contact page.


Sunday, 23 November 2014

Shidduch Problems - Men over 50 - Part 2

We're discussing the issues raised when a man over 50 wants to marry and still have children and sets a number of conditions before even considering if the woman might be a potential match. Please visit our previous post for more information. 

As mentioned in the other post, we took this scenario to some women on a few F.B. groups. The next group of responses had some comments of understanding towards the man's situation. 

A few women acknowledged the man's position but stated that "given the fact they have let life slide by and many have not focused on marriage when younger, they have little respect for them. The women request that these men consider marrying a woman who already has children or adopting." (anonymous)

A med student said that "the feeling of needing to have a biological child is not limited to gender. The difference is, a woman can now-a-days have a biological child without a man. For a man to do so, it is a lot harder, and in Israel, impossible. (Finding an egg donor and surrogate). I don't think it's wrong for the man to look for someone who he can have a child with, esp. if he's saying it upfront. If a woman doesn't agree with that approach they don't need to marry him. If both parties know what they're getting into, that's their right." (R. B)

"I think it is fair to say they are looking to start a family but ridiculous and arrogant to make fertility treatments a precondition to even dating. It worries me that if this is how older men, who are "supposed" to be mature and wiser, think - what hope is there for the younger generation when looking for a Shidduch?" (Anonymous)

"I think it is very fair for them to say that they want kids, preferably their own. On the other hand, it makes it icky to specify what is needed for that to happen." (Anonymous)

Please visit our blog again for the next post of comments on what women think of this request. 

Do you have an opinion on the topic. Please post your comment below.

Are you searching for a Shidduch? Visit our website, Chessed Ve'Emet and be in touch for your Shidduch Interview.

Having some difficulty with the Shidduch Process? Be in touch with Chessed Ve'Emet for a Shidduch workshop, mentoring or counselling to assist in easing your process and helping you come to Chuppah.

Thursday, 20 November 2014

Shidduch Problems - Men over 50 - Part 1

Over the past months or year, we have had a number of men contact us for our Shidduch service. Before you get excited, these men have a tough request. They are men ages 50 – 70 some previously married with children, some previously married without children and some who never married. All of them are wanting children from the marriage they are searching for. Now if they would say they just want children and are open to how Hashem enables them to be a father, then there are many possibilities. They could, for example, marry a woman who has children and be a good step-father to them, they could support orphans, they could even adopt orphans or abandoned children. But these options are not ones they are prepared to consider. They all want their own biological children and hence before considering if a woman is compatible or not, number one is she must be young, thin, pretty and prepared to have all fertility treatment including I.V.F or egg donation if having children is not happening fast enough. Keep in mind that egg donation means the baby would not be the woman's biological child but this does not concern them.

I took this scenario to women in a few F.B. groups and have had some varied replies. I'll share some of these over several posts

The first group of responses were fairly similar. A number of women find this request makes them feel uncomfortable or ill, one expressed it as though "the men are looking for a breeding cow or goat and not someone to be a lifelong companion." (anonymous)

"Are they looking for a surrogate or a partner? Life works in funny ways. When one is a child there is hope married by age x, kids by age y etc and then life happens. I think they should look for someone to build a relationship, life with and hope for children etc. But then again in this day and age there are all types of people out there..." Anonymous

Please visit our blog again for the next post of comments on what women think of this request. 

Do you have an opinion on the topic. Please post your comment below.

Are you searching for a Shidduch? Visit our website, Chessed Ve'Emet and be in touch for your Shidduch Interview.

Having some difficulty with the Shidduch Process? Be in touch with Chessed Ve'Emet for a Shidduch workshop, mentoring or counseling to assist in easing your process and helping you come to Chuppah.

Wednesday, 19 November 2014

Are you Searching for Meaning

Are you searching for meaning in your life? Are the current events in the world causing you to question and wonder? All kinds of questions can come up, especially to the last few weeks in Israel. While some questions will have to wait for answers until the coming of Moshiach (the Messiah) when Eliyahu HaNavi (Elijah the Prophet) will answer all our questions, there are many answers we can find. 

The only real place to find answers to the meaningful of our lives, how to develop purpose, how to increase meaning and purpose in our lives, what is good and kind and when it is kind to set a limit is to study from the Torah. In truth, how to live effectively in this world and realize our potential, is all to be found in the Torah. For the Torah was given to us from the Creator of all, Who "Looked into the Torah and Created the World." 

What does this mean? Was this before creating light and dark? If so, how did He see to look into a Torah? How did the Torah exist if it was not yet written as we know it? How did He Look if G-d has no body?

If you have questions, the place to find them is in the Torah. It takes having the right teacher and lots of patience to learn and learn, ask questions and learn some more. It takes being humble enough to say you don't understand and to keep searching until you find an answer or reach a level where you realize your question has to be set aside for Eliyahu HaNavi to answer.

At Chessed Ve'Emet we offer Torah learning online and in person. We invite you to join us from the comfort of your own home. Learn a specific section or from a Sefer of your choice. If you do not yet know how to read Hebrew, we can teach you that too. 

Please note, we teach authentic Torah only.

Find the meaning in your life that you are searching for.  

Be in touch TODAY!

We look forward to hearing from you. 

Sunday, 16 November 2014

Does Judaism Believe in LIfe after Death? Part 2

In a previous post we mentioned the first time in the day that we become aware of life beyond this world. In the sequence of tasks for one's daily routine, our next reminder of a world beyond this word is when reciting the morning blessings. Following the initial 17 blessings, we reciting a blessing for learning Torah. This is recited at the start of the day to cover any aspect of Torah learning that we might engage in at any time of the day and night ahead of us. 

The last paragraph that is recited ends with a list of activities we engage in for which we are rewarded in this world while the main reward awaits us in the World to Come. From the wording used here we are aware that Judaism has a belief not only in a world after this one but also that we receive reward for good deeds carried out in this world.

If you would like to learn more about the teachings of the Torah on the topic of the soul and they journey of the soul, or the laws related to our daily living, please visit our website and sign up for our online Torah learning. If you are in Israel and would prefer to learn in person, please be in touch for that too. 
If you would like to sponsor learning of Mishnayos in the merit of a loved one, Chessed Ve'Emet offers a special service for this.

Wednesday, 12 November 2014

How to Select an Appropriate Kallah Teacher

How do you select a Kallah teacher who is right for you?

That's an excellent question. There are a few factors to keep in mind:

1) Location: 

Do you wish to go to a Kallah teacher in person? If so, is there one in your area? 

If not, a good option is online learning. 

If you are open to learning online, Chessed Ve'Emet offers Kallah lessons online and in person and would be happy to teach you.

2) Knowledge of your Kallah teacher:

You want to make sure that your Kallah teacher is certified and has the knowledge that you need. 

Chessed Ve'Emet has Shoshanah Shear who is a Kallah teacher and occupational therapist working in the area of women's health and health-and-wellness.

3) Availability:

You need to make sure that your Kallah teacher is available with enough time to teach you all the material before your Chuppah. Be in touch with those you wish to learn with and find out how many sessions you will need and whether they have the time available to teach you effectively

4) Price:

If you are getting married, you want your Kallah lessons to be affordable. But remember, you get what you pay for, so free is not always the best option. If you are searching for a Kallah teacher who is dedicated to teaching this material and will invest the time necessary to help you master this important area of your married life, starting with coming to Chuppah, then be prepared to respect their time and be willing to compensate them accordingly. Of course the compensation needs to be affordable but showing your respect for their time, effort and knowledge will pay off by their giving even more of themselves to help you master this material. 

These are just a few tips, If you have any questions or would like to sign up for Kallah lessons, do be in touch with us at Chessed Ve'Emet - We'd love to hear from you.  


Chessed Ve'Emet also provides classes for your Chatan! Once you're ready to master the material needed - have your Chatan be in touch us as well so that you have the advantage of learning from one organisation - together!

Sunday, 9 November 2014

Does Judaism Believe in Life after Death?

A reader recently asked:

"Does Judaism believe in a world after this one or in life after death?"

The answer is yes. The first place that we are aware of something taking place beyond this world is in the first moments we awaken and begin to open our eyes each day. Torah law commands Jews to recite a blessing upon awakening that thanks G-d for restoring their soul to them. If so, one can ask where did my soul go to that I should thank G-d for giving it back to me?

Here we have the first glimpse that our soul does not remain in our body for 24 hours of the day all  the days of our lives, but leaves our body at certain times and it is the kindness of G-d that our soul is returned to us each morning.

If you would like to learn more about the teachings of the Torah on the topic of sleep, the soul and they journey of the soul, or the laws related to our daily living, please visit our website and sign up for our online Torah learning. If you are in Israel and would prefer to learn in person, please be in touch for that too. 

If you would like to sponsor learning of Mishnayos in the merit of a loved one, Chessed Ve'Emet offers a special service for this.

Friday, 7 November 2014

FaceBook Groups and Shidduchim

We have joined a few of the Face Book groups to assist with Shidduchim, help your friends get married and the like. It is amazing to see how many will keep commenting the same kinds of comments. Are these groups helping?

A recent comment from a professional who is single shows that there is a need for something more. The personal touch and professional attention of a Shadchan who devotes time to assist in this process.

If you find yourself frustrated with posting on various online groups and not getting the kinds of dates you are looking for, do take a look at our Professional, Caring Shidduch Service. We do have a structured interview to start the process but you will find that it is well worth the time and money to invest in the 1-2 hours to complete the interview.

Please be intouch, we'd love to hear from you and you help you in your process of coming to Chuppah.

Sunday, 26 October 2014

The Shidduch Crisis: The Importance of Marrying Jewish


This article is written by Shoshanah Shear, Freelance Writer and Author
Shadchan and more. 

In our previous post, we began to share the first of a series of Shidduch tips. Before we continue with these tips, we'd like to touch on various factors and issues that are contributing to the Shidduch crisis that is experienced world wide. 

Let us begin with an idea that for some is common sense but for others they can be wondering "What does that have to do with me?" The topic is "Why marry Jewish?"

Many feel that as long as the person is a good person, it does not matter if s/he is Jewish or not Jewish, as long as I marry a good person, that is what counts. Sadly that thinking is contributing to the Shidduch crisis.

"Nonsense!" you might say. Well let us take a look at a few concepts and then offer a summary.

In Parshas Va'Eschanan 7:3 we read "You shall not intermarry with them; you shall not give your daughter to his son, and you shall not take his daughter for your son." This is a direct command in the Chumash itself which means it's a positive command or Mitzvah which is Torah based. Torah based Mitzvos have stronger importance and significance than Rabbinical Mitzvos. It is not that anyone is learning this out, it is a direct command in the Torah. 

Since we are commanded to marry Jews only, let us consider another concept. The Gemara in Nidda 16b teaches that at the time of conception, an angel takes a drop of this conception to Hashem in order to receive direction. Who the Neshama will marry, whether s/he will be rich or poor, what house s/he will be born into and many other details. If at the time of conception, it is already decided who the Neshama should marry, that Neshama will be a Jew. What does this mean?

At the time of birth, the baby is touched on the lip and forgets all that s/he learnt when in the womb. This means, whether or not the Neshama knew who s/he should marry, I do not know, but s/he comes into this world to fulfill a mission. Though we are given freedom of choice, the Chumash tells us to choose life. Life being fulfillment of Torah and Mitzvos.

So the baby is born to family x with exactly the set of circumstances that are perfect for whatever purpose s/he has come into this world. That includes marrying a specific person as decided for you when you were conceived. Now comes our problem related to why we should marry Jewish. 

Hashem in His infinite Wisdom will ONLY decree that a Jewish Neshama marries a Jewish Neshama as that is in keeping with Torah. If we come along and use our freedom of choice to marry someone who is not Jewish, not only do we go against a positive commandment of the Torah, but we force the Jew who was destined to be our soul -mate, our spouse, to go into the Shidduch pool and suffer the difficulty of trying to find you but you are not there. Where are you? With a non-Jew.

This is the first of various factors that are contributing to the Shidduch crisis.

What can you do to help? First and foremost, marry a Jew

In the next post we hope to give a few practical tips to help you to marry a Jew.


If you know any Jew or Jews who are looking to get married, Chessed Ve'Emet offers a comprehensive, professional Shidduch Service
Please be in touch for a Shidduch interview.

If you would like to learn more about the Torah approach to marrying, Chessed Ve'Emet offers Torah shiurim individually and in groups, online or in person. Do be in touch for this too.


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